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What (my) coaching is all about - education, attitude, process

Updated: Jul 11, 2023



"What kind of coach are you?" is a question I often hear when I tell people what I do for a living. Sometimes I jokingly answer, "I'm a good coach". Of course, that doesn't answer the question at all. So let's start from the beginning.


"Coaching" is not a trademarked term. Anyone who likes can call themselves a coach. That's where the difficulty starts when looking for a good coach.


There are many different types of "coaches" on the market. For example, so-called business coaches, management coaches, life coaches, and many more.


The term coaching actually comes from sports, where a coach is someone who looks at the whole situation of an athlete. A trusted partner who can take on many roles and work with other experts for the benefit of the athlete.


When I say a coach, I mean someone who hosts solution-oriented, structured conversations. For example, a coach helps you make a decision, define a goal, develop professionally or personally. The coach is an expert for the process and the client is the expert for his or her topic.


My education

I completed my training as a systemic* - constructivist* - analytical* coach (see below for an explanation of terms) at the European Systemic Business Academy in 2013. First the basic course in Munich and then the professional course in Vienna. In total, this was 3 years of training, in which, in addition to learning tools, theories, and techniques, practice and self-experience (i.e. therapy to work on your topics) were in the foreground.

The special thing about this training was (and is) that you have the opportunity to get to know many different coaches and therapists and to meet the mothers and fathers of coaching and therapy approaches, to learn directly from them. The second very important aspect of this training is that self-experience (i.e. therapy) is considered essential. In my eyes, this is a necessary foundation for successful work as a coach. On one hand, working on one's issues leads to more energy and also to more experience in the position of the client. On the other hand, it is important to know one's issues and triggers so that one does not confuse them with the client's issues.

As one of my teachers expressed the content of the education, "What you learn here is three things: Attitude, attitude, attitude." And from the fact that I like to quote this, you can tell that I agree with this perception.


My attitude


Working on eye level is important in my coachings. My attitude as a coach is that I understand each client as a land of their own, whose boundaries I respect. I am aware that my reality is not necessarily the reality of my client. Everything I offer, I respectfully place on the "border" of my client's land. It can be rejected or accepted by my client at any time. And both are equally ok. I believe that my clients are experts in their own lives and that the solution to their questions lies within themselves. As a coach, I guide the process, listen closely and, above all, ask questions that open up possibilities for my clients.


Everything that happens in a coaching session is subject to confidentiality on my part. This means that - even if your boss pays for a coaching session with me - I only talk to third parties about topics and contents that have been agreed with you in advance. What you do with the contents of a coaching session is entirely up to you. Everybody involved will be informed about this before we start working together.


Further education


I am an arts master and after school, I studied English, German, and Philosophie. After my coaching education at the ESBA, I completed a Size Process Coach course at the Resilience Centre in Berlin, attended a course in Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg, became a certified Scrum Master, and recently have become interested in the trauma therapeutic approach Somatic Experiencing by Peter Levin. And now that the SE Basics course is behind me, I am looking forward to the 3-year training in the next few years. In addition, I am constantly working with colleagues for my own supervision and psycho-hygiene.

In my coaching sessions, I like to use body-therapeutic ideas and tools from approaches such as Grinberg, Gestalt therapy, systemic constellations, or tantric work, in addition to the tools from systemic coaching. The body often gives us important information that our clever brain doesn't allow to enter our consciousness so easily.


People I work with

I work with private individuals as well as with companies. For corporates, I am usually booked in the role of a consultative Agile Coach or Team Coach. Since 2021, I have also been working as a sparring partner with medium-sized entrepreneurs who want to implement self-organization in their companies according to the values of New Work and Agile. (You can find an article on self-organization in companies here).


Private individuals, I accompany on professional and private issues.


Good reasons for coaching can be:

You want to grow into a new (professional) position.

You want to take the next steps towards your goal

You want to (re-)negotiate your salary, or increase your daily rate as a freelancer.

You dream of another job

You want to (re)discover your creativity

You want to become more self-confident in your private or professional life

You want to work on your resilience and self-love

You are looking for a sparring partner for so-called "crazy ideas" and want to realize them

You want to get a good overview of your current situation

You want to find and realize your goals

As I am also an artist, I am also happy to support artists on their way to their original.


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By the way:

Once a month I offer free coaching for someone who cannot afford my service. (Feel free to write me an email about this. In case you would like to support me so that I can continue to offer these free coaching sessions, you can support me here: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/siriberlin


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I like working with people. I am interested in the potential of each individual and what makes their eyes shine. My question is: What makes you feel a hundred percent alive?

What I like most in a coaching session is when I see how happy it makes my client when they realize that they have found their solution.


If you are interested in a coaching session, maybe you are looking for the answer to a question, or you want to reflect on a decision you want to make, or you are searching for a goal. Or you want to discuss what the next right step towards your goal could be. Your topic can also be a developmental topic and come from your private or professional life. We will always make sure to discuss the topic that is most important to you at the moment. Sometimes topics come to light in coaching sessions you did not think about before.


The process of a coaching session

When you contact me, I first offer you a free 20-minute conversation. We get to know each other a little and see if and how we want to work together. Afterwards, we will make an appointment or discuss a coaching package - consisting of several appointments - tailored to your topic and your needs.

Normally my coaching sessions last one hour. Some clients prefer 90-minute or even 2-hour meetings. I am also happy to offer half or full days if you would like to work intensively on your issue.


At the beginning of a coaching session, we look at what your goal horizon is and what you want to achieve in the hour together. For example, I ask: "If you are satisfied with this session and you think it was a good idea to go to a coaching, what do you take away?"


Once we have found your goal, we can start. During the coaching, I ask from time to time, "Are we still on the right track towards your goal?" to make adaptations possible and to readjust.

In addition, I take notes and visualize the process. This enables us to work together in an even more focused way. While we often start the coaching at a table, changing positions or working around the room is another way to get to the root of one's topic.


You are welcome to take all notes and visualizations home with you after the session to reflect on them again.


Sometimes, I send you an email with ideas for further work on a topic or a summary of what we have worked on. Interesting to know is that sometimes the impact of coaching unfolds right after the session, and sometimes days or weeks later.


When do I recommend coaching?


Coaching is a good idea when you want to change or rethink something. Where am I at the moment? What possibilities do I have? Where do I want to go? Am I still on the right track?

It doesn't matter where you are on your path and where you want to go. You have already taken the first step if you have come across this article while looking for a coach.

Feel free to contact me if you are interested in coaching.


I currently work in English and German.


I look forward to hearing from you.

Sunny greetings,

Simone

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Explanation of words:


Systemic:

Systemic means, in simple terms, that we assume that we live in systems. For example, in a family system, a working system, or a friend system. These systems consist of several people who relate to each other. These systems influence us and are always at the table in coaching. In addition, we take on a certain role in systems, which does not necessarily have to be chosen. For example, if I am born in a family where there is already a quiet child, then I am definitely "the loud one" - no matter how inaccurate that may feel to me and from the outside. Systemic theory comes from family therapy and was significantly influenced by Virginia Satir.

*Constructivist:

Radical constructivism (for example according to Heinz v. Foerster) is part of a coach's respectful attitude. The basic assumption here is that our respective reality is shaped by our subjective perception and cannot be felt "objectively". Thinking constructively means being aware that everyone constructs their reality. The client has sovereignty over his or her reality. This means that only the client knows what is right and coherent for him or her. Constructivism also makes us aware that only what I can think is possible is possible in fact for me.


*Analytical

Analytical in this case describes that the coaching approach draws on knowledge and theories of Freudian psychoanalysis and its successor theories.

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